Leadia Pillars

Such a big sigh of relief now that school is officially over — and that in four months (yes, we have a loooong summer break this year), I will come back as a sophomore, hopefully with my hands, heart and art spirit renewed and ready for another round of deadlines and art-making.

Here’s a distillation of the past few months, taken from a portfolio I prepared for sculpture class:

The second semester…was a roller coaster ride that brought intense moments of work followed by extended lull periods. I learned, from finding my way through it, that this cycle of bursts and lulls is not healthy for the creative spirit. The most critical reality check I got this semester was that managing creative energy is also a skill that one builds up alongside the techniques of art making. To always be ready and inspired takes as much discipline as it does to paint, draw or sculpt.

*     *     *

Today we saw applicants being interviewed for the next school year, eyes wide open in both fear and excitement.  Someone teasingly suggested that we all walk by and flash our IDs to rattle them.  I’ll leave it to the kids to play pranks but I’m glad to be out of that boat of uncertainty.  I have my ID, and I made it through year one.

I’m thankful for the year that was.

Tonight it will sink in what it means to be free again.  I can have a bit of my old life back:  slow days with no schedules and with balance as the overarching theme — balanced socials (I shall see my friends again), balanced health (diet and sports, yay!), balanced play (I can read! Play video games! Marathon movies and shows! and best of all TRAVEL!) and balanced work (I can focus on production with monetary gain).

I’m roaring with the quiet energy to distill, then pounce. Everyday.

Ayayayay.  Must remind myself to manage this energy.

But for now, let me just shout it out loud again, “I’m a sophomore!”

Thank you. xx

Our feet have many stories to tell. Every new story begins with a prodding, a yes, a step — but who tells us where to go? And who tells us when to stop?

“Go, go over there, then stop.”
Lifecasts using two-piece molds
Material used: Plaster
Date completed: January 30, 2014

Meditation piece on repetition, variety, and rhythm. Still part of the sculpture series on flow.

Flow is a theme I keep coming back to, as a reminder both for myself and others.  For this plate, I chose to do a piece on feet — our body part most associated with movement.  Walking, next to breathing, is one bodily function we do everyday that we can be more mindful about.  The way we walk says so much about our inner state.  How aware (or not) we are about the rhythm of our physical step translates to how aware (or not) we are about our inner rhythm.    I also decided to add in elements of direction — the next step after awareness — shown through the hands, in the positions of go and stop.  More than being in constant motion, to flow is really to vacillate between moments of movement and rest.  We stop and we go.  Everyday.

Class instructions for the plate were as follows:

PLATE #2: Repetition, Variety, Rhythm

After acquiring beginning skills in three dimensional art making through the various basic materials available, this plate aims to illustrate the application of the principles of design through three dimensional art making, specifically, the principles of repetition, variety, and rhythm…This plate is also a venue to continue skills building in the substitution process of three dimensional art, i.e. molding and casting.

Guideline:

• At least three objects in a series (you can do more):
  • three identical objects
  • three similar objects in the similar orientation
  • or three objects in a theme
• The subject/theme is body part/s, hence, body casting or life casting
  • you can submit casts of your extremities and/or your bust
• Composition is significant. Using the principles of design is all about composition, so before you cast, plan how you will present/exhibit hour pieces first and execute accordingly.

Process documentation:

All in all I made 6 lifecasting attempts for this plate:

• Right foot  — successful on first try
• Left foot —  successful on first try
• Left foot #2 — lower mold survived the first cast so tried to make a new upper mold, but failed; mold cracked
• Hand with palm open — four fingers broke off; tried to reattach them with PVA glue, but needs a more lasting solution
• Hand with pointed fingers — parts of nails broke off; repaired them with PVA glue
• Hand in a cupping position — complete fail; the two molds didn’t fit together properly during casting

Bulk of the process was experimenting and figuring out what works by just jumping in and doing it.

Below are day-by-day glimpses:

Attempt#1 at casting my foot using a two-piece mold. Excited to find out if it worked! #plaster #wastemold #foot #cast #wip

Voila, my first foot sculpture. Could be better but with a little more cleaning and sanding will be happy with it. Will try to do my hand next. #plaster #sculpture #foot #body #twopiecemold

Foot casting the left.  Better outcome than the right foot– details of nails preserved. Cracks on sole were filled in with second batch of plaster before the mold was removed.

Trying to salvage the left foot mold with cast#2. Didn’t work– lower mold cracked from weight of my foot and upper mold just altogether crumbled.

Hand casting fail. I still don’t understand what an undercut is Wide open to suggestions. #sculpture #plaster #twopiecemold #wastemold

Hand casting attempt#2. Was quite ambitious and wanted to do a pointed finger…so played around with hand positions with the least undercuts (tried to keep the fingers as leveled as possible).

Hand casting attempt #3. Teacher suggested keeping hand in a cupping position for easier casting. Lower mold crumbled. Tried to salvage it with clay to keep it together. Would’ve worked if only we got to lock the two molds properly when we put them together.

Repairing broken fingers using white PVA glue and tissue. Soaked the castings in water, then primed with diluted glue before applying thick glue. Worked for repairing thin parts that got chipped off, but not for whole fingers. Need to redo with wire and plaster.

Textual documentation and lessons learned:

• Don’t be scared to just jump in.  You learn more from doing the work than from reading about it.
• Try and try until you are happy with your work.  Lifecasting is not easy but it’s also not an impossible task.
• Clean as you go.  Working with plaster is a messy business and the dust piles up.  Best to wipe away asap to avoid waste build up and allergies.

Self-portrait
Pen on board
10″ x 10″
June 2013

Pointillism

This was our first plate for Visual Perception class.

We used a photo reference that we divided into 64 squares to form a grid, for transferring point by point onto an illustration board.

The points were no joke to make, and one blackout grid would take me over an hour to do.

Our teacher, Sir Jamel Obnamia, warned us of aching wrists but also kept telling us to persevere — a fine arts student does not give up so easily.

Tricky part was using a pen, which meant no erasing and no double takes. I made some mistakes with hair (too dark, too thick) but over-all I was happy with what I came up with.

I passed the initiation, so sugod lang. Bring it, let’s do this for 4 more years of school!

I started this blog to deposit all my art, writings and ideas in one place, but been such a delinquent for the past four months.  It’s easy to say that school got in the way, but I hope I can build up the habit of documenting on-the-go (and do it soon! the new semester starts in 3 days).

Have tons of backposts to do, but to get the ball rolling, here’s an excerpt from a Portfolio I submitted for Introduction to Sculpture class in October 2013.  Although it was just for one subject, insights apply for the semester as a whole:

It was always a joy to come to class on presentation day, with my work in tow, ready to share the output of weeks worth of dedicated energy and labor. More importantly, I found joy in sharing my creative process out loud – there is merit in verbalizing one’s struggles and their attendant solutions: the choices we made, whether big or small, in order to proceed with the work. The greatest joy, however, came from being wowed by my classmates’ works and listening to their own processes. There was always so much to be learned during these debriefing moments and I found them essential to the gift of the class: the discovery of one’s creative logic.

Creativity is indeed problem-solving, and to be bombarded with this task everyday – to keep finding solutions and exploring possibilities – is both a blessing and responsibility that every artist learns to nurture and carry with a smile.

…

Working with three-dimensional forms has opened me up to the world of in-the-round – appreciating art from different viewpoints. This is a vital mindset to cultivate as an artist, even if one decides to pursue the path of flat or decorative art, because it reminds us to always think of the viewer or receiver of our art: they are varied and their interpretation of our art is always based on their context.

Documentation and presentation are also vital lessons learned this first semester, and I hope to develop them as healthy habits in the creative process.

Plan to blog the rest of that portfolio in bite-size posts, but if you want a peep into what a semester in UP Fine Arts is like and are up for a read (it’s 60 pages long!), sharing the rest of it below:

Portfolio PILAR JOHANNA Oct2013.pdf

“Make it Rain”
Oil on canvas, February 2013

My first oil in 7 years.

Painting has become my default answer to the question, “What makes you happy?” But for over 10 years now, I’ve been saying it without actually living it.  Someone I’d just met called me out on it recently– I haven’t seriously painted either because #1 I’m lazy, or #2 I’m scared to find out that I don’t have what it takes, or that it’s not for me (doesn’t make me happy).  Sometimes it takes a stranger to put you in your place and jumpstart what needs jumpstarting.

This year, 2013, I had a mindset change.  I decided that I wouldn’t hide behind the money aspect of painting anymore (“I don’t want to be a poor artist”) and just go for it 100%.  Not as a hobby I pick up more passionately when business is good, and not as an activity I act on when random inspiration hits.  Important belief shift: I can make a living and support a family with my art.

To be fair and gentle with myself, I haven’t been idle in trying to get in front of the canvas.  I’d brought out books on Chagall and Klee as early as October 2012, looking for paintings I’d like to copy.  A painter friend once told me that was how he learned — just intuitively copying the masters.  My Bargue plates are also ready and waiting for me to get back into drawing again, although just reading through the painstaking process of learning the sight-size method is overwhelming me already.  Baby steps.  I’ve also picked out dream schools I’d like to go to for further studies — I wish there were more classical ateliers in the Philippines — and have begun the arduous process of letting go of my house, which in truth is my latest art piece (a 2-year labor of love!).

Why hadn’t I painted?  My simplest answer: I had nothing to paint.

Last week, I decided to just pick out a favorite doodle and translate it onto the canvas.  There was something crucial about the first piece to come out after my hiatus, and I wanted it to be true to where I was in my life…a beacon to ready the path.

 

Doodling became my output of choice when I began my house project in 2010.  Zero set up, pack up, and drying time — it was heaven sent for busy me who lived on the go.

Now that I have a well-ventilated, well-lit studio and the stillness and quietude of having time, I have no excuse not to pick up the brush and work with oils again.  A friend has called it my homecoming.

I came out with this painting initially thinking it was almost done.  One look at it and my brother said: more texture.  I realized that too; I painted it in a flurry.  I had gotten used to painting with quick-drying gouache and acrylics, I’d forgotten the texturing that oils lent.

The painting looked flatter and more lifeless than I would’ve wanted — and it didn’t have the whimsical spirit of the doodle.  Although there are times that I’d welcome a flat image, something was amiss here.  Masyadong manipis.

I played around with the waves, and ended up layering.

While re-doing the waves, I kept thinking, “All this feels very personal, this call for texture.  I’m in my 30’s now, and the layering applies to every aspect of my life — relationships, business, food, health.  Di na pwedeng mababaw.”  And this texturing is not of hodgepodge, random layers.  It’s a decluttered layering, hindi maingay.  Every layer is meaningful, mindful.  But not without the surprise of possibility.

The flowers needed extra TLC as well.  Old habits get unearthed when given the opportunity– I found myself doing Van Gogh-inspired strokes.

With the waves, flowers and clouds layered, I kept staring at the ground and felt it needed to breathe some more.

Didn’t know what wanted to come out, but ended up playing with greens:

I worked on outlining the areas I wanted to pop out, and knew it was time to put the brush down when all I could do while looking at the painting was smile.

It’s a happy painting, and I’m happy that this was what came out as my first comeback to oil.

I had so much leftover paint on the palette, and just played around with other doodle translations.

Already bought bigger canvases, will see what comes out next.

I know I have so much to learn, and it will take the best of me to proceed with courage and caution at once.  Would love to pick up where I left off with my acrylics in 2010— was working on learning to paint people.

After working with oils for a weekend, though, I’ve been reintroduced to the patience that painting demands.  I know what this will ask of me. Will be gentle and patient, and also rigorous and unrelenting.

 

If you’d like a look at my 2010 series of paintings (acrylics), visit my flickr album.